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How did you feed yours?

Monday, 9 June 2014  |  Mummy and Little Me

Well.......not sure where to start really as I had such a hard time with Beatrice in the first few weeks with feeding . As Beatrice was a planned c section I felt very determined yet again to crack the breast feeding. However I'd only managed 3 weeks the year previously with charlie as I had infected mastitis and honestly felt horrendous and ended up on antibiotics for nearly 6 weeks which I'm not sure if this contributed to the start of the Depression ?? .. Anyway because I felt like I wasn't having a "proper" birth .... ( elective c section ) or that's what some people's opinions were anyway I felt a massive pressure to do something right or should I say socially acceptable or something along those lines. After bea was born she did have a good latch on and fed really well and this did continue till about day 4 which was prior to my discharge home . On day 4 I had developed a blister on my nipple and it had started to bleed so obviously I hadn't had bea latched on as well as I thought ... anyway the midwifes just told me to express a little milk around the nipple and to carry on . To be honest I don't think the breast feeding advice and support I had prior to discharge was that good ??? They did send me home with a book and was told to expect a visit from the breast feeding support team which were amazing . When we were home I did struggle and felt that bea wasn't getting enough milk . Again the community midwife and support workers were brill and came everyday but when bea was 13 days old the support worker noticed she was jaundice and had lost weight so the midwife sent us to hospital as she was starting to be in the failure to thrive catagorie. I had also developed a wound infection and mastitis so was also feeling poorly .... which was when I decided along with stu and midwife that I was going to stop trying to breast feed and continue over to formula feeds . I was dreadfully upset and gutted yet again that I had failed .... realistically I hadn't , realistically I was doing the best I could for my daughter and she needed to maintain feeds to clear her jaundice ... but some people don't think like that. 

I did have a conversation with one playground mum who made me feel awful who asked when I'd given up ?? I explained what happened but she just said oh so your not even trying then ?????. I didn't bother answering back to that I mean honestly bottle feeding isn't easy we had to sterilise make bottles buy milk mess about with millions of bags bottles and formula powder every time we wanted to leave the house. Where as the 1st 2 weeks I was just feeding on demand and only needed to make sure I had a towel or muslin which was much easier for us all. But it wasn't working for bea. People have lots of opinions on feeding and like to tell you them which obviously I'd had experience off . But even though I felt awful and a failure ... you don't get a gold star or a medal or a prize for managing to feed your child. You have to do what's best for your child and self no matter what the media say or publicise. ...what ever way you chose to feed your child it's all hard while you establish a routine and get yourself sorted. So to anyone who reads this formula feeding isn't a easy way out or a lazy mum plan and anyone that tells you that should be ashamed !!! So dear yummy mummy in the playground that made me cry that week !!! My beautiful daughter hasn't suffered for formula feeding and we are both happy with our routine !!! So yep well done for feeding for years and well done for not having problems sore nipples or mastitis ..... but spare a moment for people and actually understand that not everything works for everybody and being a mummy Is hard work without added stress of silly opinions !!! So to all yummy mummies out there as long as your happy, baby is happy and tummy is full does it really matter ???? Xxx it's a marathon this feeding game is not a sprint :)

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