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Help needed to wean off the breast!

2 CommentsWednesday, 14 February 2018  | 

 

 

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Back when I was pregnant you knew that no matter what the appointment was for they were guaranteed to drone on and on about breastfeeding and how it was the best thing to do for our baby etc etc and at our antennal class my husband asked me if I would try it and I agreed, but I was apprehensive as we both knew that I didn't really like anything touching my nipples as I was sensitive about them and I didn't even like my husband touching them. So I didn't think that breastfeeding would be for me but I promised that I would try. If I was successful I only expected it to last for about 9-12 months which seemed to be the norm, but here we are 3.5 years later and my daughter still breastfeeds several times per day.
I know what you are thinking I must be crazy? a weird hippy? probably a vegan who boasts about feminism and 'free the nipple'? well I will let you know that sadly I am none of those stereotypical things. I am still just my normal self I still don't like my nipples being touched so why do I continue to breastfeed?.
The answer is simple and it is that it is the easiest thing for us, it is our normal and my daughter isn't ready to give up the boobs just yet. It isn't for trying as I have been ready to stop for the past 2 years. There is so much talk about breastfeeding from midwives, support workers, books, online articles etc etc but no one tells you how to stop and if your child isn't ready to stop then I don't see a way out?.
I tried a couple of years ago advised by my Dr when I was on antibiotics and I won't go into details but it was absolute hell and traumatising for us both. Now that she is approaching 4 I am ready to say enough is enough I am beyond 'touched out' and my poor boobs need a break and treating to a nice well fitted bra. I recently mentioned to my daughter that she is a big girl now and doesn't need mummy's milk anymore, I suggested a small party when she is 4 to say goodbye to them and she will get a present but she was very upset with the idea. The next day we carried on as usual and when it was time for bed she burst into tears randomly saying that 'she didn't want to say goodbye', I had forgotten our previous conversation and said 'you don't want to say goodbye to who?' as I really had no clue what she was talking about and she said 'your boobies'. She was so upset it was a shame, I told her that she can't have it forever and that my body will stop making it but I don't want to go cold turkey and traumatise her as I have tried that before and it didn't work it backfired bigtime. I have waited years to find the right time to stop and even talked to the health visitor about it and took some tips on board and I am starting to lose hope, obviously she still won't be breastfeeding when she is like 10 but for me personally 4 needs to be it but I need to do it the kindest, easiest way possible. About a month ago her Grandma asked her what her favourite thing about Daddy was and she said 'playing' and she then asked 'what's your favourite thing about mummy?.' and she said 'having milk' so there we have it . She really does love it so much and even though I don't feed her out in public anymore I am slowly planting the seed that it needs to stop when she is 4 so it hopefully doesn't have to be a shock.
When she was 1 I thought to myself if I just wait until she is a toddler she will have more understanding of what's going on and it will be easier to stop, boy was I wrong!. I know a lot of people cannot relate to me and think that I'm just 'weird' and that I must enjoy it but I assure you that the latter one is definitely not true and I'm not so sure about the first point haha. So if anyone has any tips or experience on getting a toddler/pre-schooler to wean off the breast please hit me up on social media. - Jodie x
@wigan_mum


Jo
Wednesday, 14 February 2018  |  19:37

I would also be interested in kind ways of doing this, my daughter looks heart broken when I say she cant have boobie. Shes only coming up to 2 but I am trying to implant the seed in her that it has to stop at some point. Im fine letting her having it at night until shes older but its just daytime I would like to cut down on! If you get lots of good advice could you write another blog detailing it please xxx


Jodie Melling
Thursday, 15 February 2018  |  15:46

Hi Jo

Thank you for your reply, it's good to know that I'm not alone. I will definitely do a updated blog post with any advice that I get and if I find anything that works. Even if I tell my daughter I don't want you to do it because it hurts she looks at me all sad eyed and says 'but I will be gentle mummy'. How do you say no to that?. If I do say no she cries and is heartbroken thinking that I'm rejecting her. I want her to want to stop for herself.

Jodie @wigan_mum

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